Snakes On A Plane 2006 Directed by: David R. Ellis Cast: Samuel L. Jackson, Julianna Margulies, Nathan Phillps, Rachel Blanchard

Written by: Jaysin Champion AKA Jay Decay January 21, 2007

Alright now here we sit on Pacific Air Flight 121 heading towards LA.  On deck we have a stewardess on her last day of work played by Julianna Margulies (better known for her role as Nurse Carol Hathaway on the TV show ER. An annoying rich girl played by Rachel Blanchard (Road Trip, Sugar & Spice, Without a Paddle and her annoying role as Cher Horowitz on the TV show Clueless).

Also we have a rapper who's ego is bigger than his popularity played by Flex Alexander (Juice, Money Train), a bunch of unimportant people and our two stars, Nathan Phillips (Wolf Creek) and Samuel L. Jackson (everything under the sun including his best roles *in my opinion* Amos and Andrew, Jurassic Park, Pulp Fiction, Sphere, Jackie Brown and his role as Mace Windu in the new Star Wars movies).

Now introductions aside this movie SUCKED! This movie consisted of a bunch of people on a flight with snakes, and that's it.... Most of the snakes were CGI, or computer generated for those of you that aren't FX savvy, people drop like flies *maybe that was a good thing* and to put insult to injury it's ironically raining during the flight, to add to the drama. Now I admit some of the ways the people are bitten was kind of humorous, but some of the snakes weren’t even poisonous!

I do feel bad for Samuel L. Jackson though because it seems as of late his roles keep getting lesser and lesser. I do think he's got something about him that people like but he is the same person in every movie, his look never changes, his attitude, nothing. It's more like watching a lame B-flick and he just POPS in to make it a bigger budgeted film.

The breakdown of Snakes on a Plane is as follows:

Body Count: I lost count at 25, kept going up and down; snake bite victims are so unpredictable!

Boob Count: 1 set of huge beautiful boobs... Those things gave me nightmares after watching this flick!

Other : A set of autographed boobs, joint smoking' mile high sex, a snake biting a dude's wolfdork after he takes a tinkle on his head, a sweet 'snake explosion in the microwave" scene, a snake down a chick's throat, a anaconda eating a guy whole *almost*, and a painful high heel in the ear!

Jay Decay's Rating: